1. If you are ever even remotely tempted to try and get busy between the plastic toilet and the barely-locked door of the airplane lavatory while you’re at 30,000 feet, here’s another good reason to resist the urge… at least on the anniversary of America’s most memorable airplane-related violence.

Seriously, if you were just “making out,” perhaps you could have kept it in your seats. Sure, the attendant might ask you to ease up a little if you start to get all handsy, but come on now… you can’t make it from LA to NY without some T&A?

2. In case it wasn’t clear after that little stunt you pulled after The Office’s big gay kiss, just because Steve Carrel gets some laughs with it on TV does not mean it’s a good idea for you to do it at work!

Doctors and even secretaries at NYU Langone Medical Center were so convinced that longtime pediatric nurse Kristen Haight was a 41-year-old virgin, they repeatedly urged her to hop in the sack, she claims in a $45 million lawsuit claiming her medical records weren’t protected.

She alleges that pediatric neurosurgeon Dr. Jeffrey Wisoff repeatedly referenced “The 40-Year-Old Virgin” movie, and reassured her that sex is “like petting something furry for the first time.”

If that was a come on, Doctor, you should know that “small and furry” hasn’t exactly been great a selling point since Alice & Wonderland was published. If you’re not a virgin yourself, it’s still fair to say you haven’t had sex (for free) in at least four decades.

3. Ever gotten the wrong response when you asked someone if an outfit made you look fat? Try being forced to do it in front of some random dude who has to size you up in order to fit you into a pair of bra and panties. Seriously.

Thanks to the strict segregation laws in [Saudi Arabia], women have been banned from working in sales or using fitting rooms. That means that women buy thongs and negligees from male salesman who size them up by looking at them. In one recent incident, a woman asked for a 32C padded bra, and the salesman told her, “No, you’re not a C.”

Dude. You might as well have told her that you didn’t serve “her kind” in your establishment, so she could come back with her crew of bra salesladies to kick your butt out, Pretty Woman style. Probably wearing a different dress, though. ”In 2008, financial adviser Reem Asaad launched a campaign to allow women to work as clerks in lingerie stores. Thanks to her efforts, shops have been ordered to switch to female employees by the end of the year.” Take that, sales jerk! They took ‘yer jobs!

4. Does birth control make you stupid? Well…. a recent study from UC Irvine suggests:

Women using hormonal contraceptives for as little as one month remembered more clearly the main steps in [a] traumatic event – that there had been an accident, that the boy had been rushed to the hospital, that doctors worked to save his life and successfully reattached both his feet, for instance. Women not using them remembered more details, such as a fire hydrant next to the car.

So, without birth control we can remember all the little details, like the environment in which an event took place. With birth control, women were “better” at remembering things that actually happened. What does that even mean? That some of the women who weren’t on birth control were also smoking too much pot that day and couldn’t remember whether it was little Timmy’s hands or feet that needed re-attaching? WTF?